“Two for Coraline, please.”
“That’s one adult and one child for a total of $__.__”
“Uh…”
“Hey! She’s cutting us a deal! Go for it!”
“Uh… This is my wife. She’s not a child.”
“Okay, sure. Whatever. That’ll be $__.__”
Later
“I can’t believe you didn’t go for that. We could have saved the money!”
“I would have felt weird! Creepy weird! I don’t want people to think I’m a grown man who spends Valentine’s Day with underage girls.”
“…Did I ever tell you about that time I scammed the zoo out of their adult fare?”
Yeah, so now he’s known as the guy who *marries* underage girls Good call, Death Ray.
Hey, I called you like a million times today to tell you good news about smart furniture.
This isn’t the first time that this has happened, actually. The girl who cuts my hair thought I was sixteen until I told her otherwise. And remember when I got carded at C’est What?